YTT200Hr Journal Week 1
Firstly, big thank you to Jessica and Alexis for helping me on this excruciating Week 1 of strength building, and also raising self-awareness of our body. I am so amazed by the daily exercises that Jessica introduced to us, for working out the individual specific body muscles! It was so long overdue. Painful, but so worth it. It also truly helps that the studio is bustling with positive and great energy, especially to my forgiving yogi practitioners alongside in the same class as me. (pushes me to up my stamina somehow) These are the intricacies that one cannot get whilst studio hopping, or “Vinyasa-ing” over lives away. One thing that struck me greatly was the notion of how much i love “going with the flow” and “practicing what makes me feel good” vs. how i can become better by “being in control and committed” to my yoga practice. So much to act upon in the latter. It’s scary how i used to be able to flow into Half Moon so easily, but once the correction of alignment is set in place in each asanas, i’m all tied up and no longer able to flow. Mind-blowing too, is the fact that as far as 2000 years ago (estimated time when Patanjali’s Sutra was written), humans have been on a quest for happiness and consciousness. I mean that would be more than 200 lives or lifetimes, that the quest first started … over-assuming a very healthy average life expectancy of a 100 years. Perhaps, it was reading about B.K. Iyengar the night before Friday’s Pranayama practice that struck yet another chord very unexpectedly. Grandpa, a very self-righteous man, who never practiced yoga, but taught his children and grandchildren “his unique self-learned exercise poses” which seemed so ever similar to the Warrior poses. Not sure how and why the sudden waves of emotion hit, but it did. (Noting the similarity of 2 grandfatherly figures.) Namaste …. P.S. need a recap of steps for some of the exercises! Hope we get a run through when we have time again!
Another life for 5 weeks (HX)
I remember telling my husband about experiencing inertia about having to start this 200 hour Yoga Teacher Training Course. Don’t get me wrong. I knew what I wanted when I signed up for it, and I didn’t waver in my intention. It was just that I had been out of touch with the business district area since.. let’s just say forever. Also, being a full-time tuition teacher, I am interacting with younger people most of the time and so, I was having thoughts like, “Would I be anti-social among my course-mates? Would I be a good student – you know, being able to follow instructions, pay attention, stuff like that?” and so on. Finally, having paid the course fee being the main deterrent for backing out (kidding!), I braced myself and landed myself on one of the yoga mats at The Yoga Mandala on 5th November 2018. That day would continue holding a special place in my heart. So far, I’ve been feeling the opposite of what I felt initially. I actually look forward to going for class everyday. Not kidding! I love the meditation and asanas. I love how my course mates and I look out for each other. I am not really good with the Sanskrit but it’s okay because I just have to know it’s necessary or maybe I just need more time to grow to love it (hey, just being honest). As a student, I also love being corrected because, well, I like to be right. I know, the irony. But some things have to get worse to get better right? Fall to fly.. yada yada.. We’re all different individuals, but gathered here for similar purposes. That, in itself, is cool enough. Add in two patient and loving instructors and you know we are ready to go. I’m so thankful to be here! Namaste, Han Xiang 🙂
Honesty (self-talk) (HX)
Be honest to yourself and to others. I believe strongly in this, because then you’ll be a better person, including treating yourself better and also attracting the right people into your inner circle. Whenever we are in an asana, we experience difficulty to different extents when trying to nail the alignment of it. At least I can say that for myself. The first question I’d ask myself is, am I trying my best? And then the second one after that is, am I pushing myself too hard? So yeah, basically we shouldn’t be asking ourselves these two questions at the same time because they could mess up our heads. But after learning the definition of asana, I’ve come to realise that asking myself those questions is not confusing myself but necessary, because the first question pushes myself to my limit and then the second one eases me into a easy and comfortable pose. This honesty to myself is important because it prevents myself from getting hurt. This constant reminder to myself that I have nobody to impress is important because I need to love myself first. People who are more concerned about loving themselves and less about impressing others (and possibly hurting themselves in the process) would then become my future students. We cannot please everyone. But we can try to bring joy to more people on another day. So, if you cannot do something today, try it next time. Seek improvement, but don’t force it. Namaste, Han Xiang 🙂
Leo Yaik 2018 September 200 Hrs (3)
If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it might surprise you. Family, friends and fellow Yoga practitioners have been asking when they can attend our YTT trial class. At that point, it seems like it was going to be a while. Before I know it, starting from next week, we will be conducting our trial classes. The idea that the course I am attending is called “Yoga Teacher Training” is beginning to sink in. Things are starting to get real! I was a polytechnic lecturer. Because of that, it was assumed most of the time that I can teach, I can handle public speaking and holding a presence in class. That’s not true. One famous recollection from my ex-student was that my classes were boring and no one seems to know what I was talking about. In fact, it was so bad that I have ex-students who don’t even recall they attended my class. However, I don’t think I am a bad lecturer. Some of my very good friends were my students. When I bumped into ex-students on the road or during conferences, they still greet me as “Mr Leo”. So I would like to think that I managed to affect their lives (in a good way) and taught them something useful. Just that teaching in a classroom setting isn’t my strong suit. So, in a week’s time, I will be in a classroom setting again. Having not taught in a decade, I am not sure how it is going to turn out. I did a trial-trial class with one of my colleagues and almost everything didn’t go as expected. No matter what, I’ll try my best. I believe my fellow classmates will as well. You won’t know if you are ready until you tried it. Just like all the poses breakthrough I witnessed; you won’t know your body is ready until you tried it. What I am sure is that we are more ready than we were when we started the course. I have no doubt that what we have gone through for the past 8 weeks have prepared us well. From learning Sanskrit names, poses alignments and adjustments and strengthening up physically and mentally. What we need is to believe and have confidence in ourselves. Sure, we might make mistakes, we might fumble, we might disappoint. Learn from it and don’t be sorry. Be better (Said Kratos. Tard joke). To TYM 2018 September 200 hours YTT batch, you can do it. See you at the finish line! Leo Yaik @ahtut
Week 1 of YTT: Getting kicked out of your comfort zone
I never thought that I would one day be attending a Yoga Teacher Training course. I’ve always been someone who just takes the easy way out – whether it was choosing what course to study in school or what career path to take; I just did whatever I knew I would do well in without much effort, even if I hated them. That’s probably also why I’ve never continued practicing yoga for more than 3 months at a go in the past; when it starts to get tough, I stop doing them. But that’s not really what life should be like, isn’t it? To be honest, I was also given a ‘kick’ to start this course. I went back and forth about whether I should do it; after a year of consistent practice, which is miraculous for me, I thought that I wanted to learn more than what the one-hour classes taught and beyond what was offered on the mat, but I was held back a lot by personal mind blocks. When you have a lifetime of taking it easy, it’s sometimes hard to break out of the habit – I wanted to explore deeper and knew that a structured course suited my personality better than trying to read all about it on my own, but I kept thinking that it might be too difficult, that I am too fat or weak to do some of the advanced poses, that I would have to interact with too many people which is terrifying for an introvert, that I wasn’t ready. I discussed it with the husband, who then told the entire world that I was doing the course – so I had no choice but to sign up for it. I guess you could say that my husband knows me well enough to realise that if I didn’t have the kick, I would still be sitting on my sofa thinking about it (hey hey, I’m a Kapha here – we love our sofas), but I can’t help but curse him every night I come home with pains everywhere but my toes. Side note, I love how Jessica asks us the next day where it hurts – I think the question should really be where does it not hurt? But I am glad that I did sign up for the course (please don’t tell my husband, I’m not really ready to forgive him and give him credit). It’s quite refreshing to come out of your comfort zone – whether it was challenging yourself to poses that used to be inaccessible, or learning a new language, or even trying to be less introverted and opening up to not-yet-familiar people about your body. It’s nice to finally let go of self-imposed limitations and try to convince yourself that one day you will get there if you keep trying, even if it’s not today. After a lifetime of taking the easy way out, I’ve realized that just because you do well in something, it doesn’t mean that you will enjoy doing it. Although there are a lot more to learn, a whole lot more physical pain to go through, and even though many poses don’t come naturally and my body is crying every night, I could at least say that my heart is at ease and happy and that I am having fun. Now that’s what life should be like, isn’t it? Till next week, or when I learn to type with my toes. Joan
TIME..oh time..
Time oh time, we’ve had such a love/hate relationship these past few years – wouldn’t you agree? Sometimes there is too much of you which makes me wish for things to speed up a notch. Other times, there is too little of you which keeps me begging for more. The weirdest part of it all is that we know that time never disappears, it is always there, but all depends on how you treat it. I want to connect my reasoning above to yoga and properly taking instructions. I find myself being an eager individual, at times a semi-listener. The eagerness within me will be too excited about achieving the end result in a yoga position, making me speed up and abandon the important step by step instructions. The end result? Well, falling over could be one of them, trying to kick up in a head stand – although control in all postures is crucial in yoga. My lesson learned: take TIME, time to; listen, follow instructions properly. The end result: great success (hopefully). /Annie
Welcome Curiosity!
I believe that curiosity is such an important quality to cherish in life. You know those people you end up sitting next to at a dinner party where you find yourself out of breath due to their lack of curiosity and you needing to blabber mouth on and on to fill the awkward silence? Well, we don’t love that do we? HENCE – ask more, then you will learn more, otherwise there’s quite a lot of things you will miss out on learning. If anyone asks you a question we seldom shame them and call them stupid, right? With that being said, we still find ourselves reluctant to ask questions while in a group, not wanting to feel stupid, misunderstood etc. As yoga is a practice, so is daring to step out of the comfort zone and just bluntly asking whatever you are curious about. During the first week of YTT I’ve gradually let this fear of mine go. /Annie
How do you stay grounded?
During day 1 of YTT we got asked the question of what yoga is for us, no answer being wrong. To me, yoga is an honest meeting with myself that helps me let go of all those unnecessary thoughts such as over analyzing a comment, the future – helping me enjoy the present instead. Yoga today can at times, depending on how, where and by whom it is practiced by be focused on the physical body mainly. For me yoga works as a holistic practice where “superficial” aspects play less of a role. The time I spend on my yoga mat often gives me a glimpse of something more – that feeling of love and harmony that always exists on the inside. It connects me to my emotions and reminds me of all the basic things in life; appreciating the energy being shared in the room with fellow classmates, breathing deep breaths, feeling pride in building a strong body for a bigger purpose of being able to carry myself in whatever life has to bring. Something that helps me stay grounded in life is to always ask the questions of: -For who am I doing this? -Why am I doing this? If that Instagram post works in a way of giving us a split second dose of happiness we need to go back to the questions above. We all have to create are own helpful/reminding tools that help us stay grounded.. /Annie
BREATHING! So underestimated..
SO! It’s Friday today and the first week of YTT is now over. Usually Friday is one of those days where the intense pace of the week and multiple new impressions would have an introvert like me feeling pretty tired. What I find interesting is that I don’t really feel that way as I scan my body sitting at home in my sofa. Of course there probably are multiple explanations to my high energy level: meeting new amazing people, enrolling in a YTT which has been a dream of mine for a long time and much more… One major focus during the YTT which could seem like a basic practice has been breathing. More specifically “Pranayama”, expansion of life force. Is that what I’m experiencing now? – a heightened life force? Well, I definitely think so, at least this is a start! The first few days of our practice, taking a deep breath was actually pretty challenging for me, but everyday this week I’ve experienced that I gradually take deeper breaths and can “hold” my “OM” in our meditation much longer than day 1. Another sensation, as mentioned above is feeling more energetic, which really makes sense since I’ve allowed more oxygen to enter my body. It might seem like such a basic, simple thing – but I really feel like a reminder is in place to BREATH! Breath, breath, breath y’all! Fueling the body with as much oxygen as possible is a kind gesture towards your body. /Annie
PLAYFULNESS
Hey everyone! This is me executing my first written assignment during the 200hr YTT at The Yoga Mandala. The word “homework” has in the past always gotten me into a really serious mode where I can’t think of anything else than finishing my assignment in the best way possible. Yoga is really special to me since my practice always keeps me reconnecting with my mind, body and soul – I say reconnect since the fast past society we live in has a tendency to make me lose that important connection that helps us stay grounded as human beings and not as human “doings”… Yoga reminds me to stay playful in life. The word “play” meaning: “engage in activity for enjoyment and recreation rather than a serious or practical purpose”. The activity of enjoyment being yoga in my case lets me be in a constant experimental mode with new, old and challenging postures. For me, this is when I get to play! I believe playfulness is crucial in life. If we start getting to serious in how we go about in everyday life we lose sense of allowing us to let go of boundaries. Boundaries do not feed our creativity, and without creativity there will be no innovation in society. So.. something starting only just on your mat can be the beginning of something major. /Annie
